Wednesday, August 08, 2007

New song of mine.

girls try not to fall in love with me. guys please stop asking if i'm gay because of my good looks. the few who have asked me the weirdest questions, no, i do not want to do a threesome with someone i don't even know, i don't want to see you naked, i do not want to join ur nazi association and i'm most definitely not going
into punk rock band.

now the strumming pattern is similar to most modern rock songs i guess. so its not too difficult to figure out. i played this in open chord G but it has a nicer open chord ringing sound if u play it in open E and do a chord progression upwards. for lazy purposes just play in G la.

the verses are played in the same chords.

Love and peace to all

Capo on the 3rd /or play in G

1st verse:
Broken signs along the highway,
Lord give me direction to turn
Shattered windshields on the byway
Heaven give me daylight so I won’t burn

2nd verse:
Battered stories along the roadway
Beauty emerges from the shadows
If we don’t see it my way
How do they live? Heaven knows…

Love and peace to all
Lets make love not war
Love and peace to all
Lets make love not war

3rd verse:
Fractured dreams, have it your way
We all leave our futures to fate
Maybe one day, somehow, someway
True love will arrive for all who wait


Mindless times of fast food living
All consuming fire of hate
Maybe we should all start giving
Think of all the years left ahead


C#m Asus4
The world’s the most perfectest place,
If not for religion or race,
C#m Asus4
We would have so much more love to give,
If not for the money we live.

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Hey! Thanks for doing this. Please get back to me ASAP! Thanks a million!

1) what happened at sing4kids?
2) So is it true that you hid in the toilet and drank alcohol?
3) Why did you do that?
4) Didn't you swear when you performed at the Can do! event too?
5) So why do you act that way when you perform?
6) You have now 'misbehaved' twice in school performance, what or are
you doing anything to rectify your behaviour?
7) can you be trusted to perform without vulgarities, etc?
8) Have you apologised to Paul, the Principal or the organisers?

Tasha :)

Reply to dearest Tasha.:

1) we sang….raise money for the kids. I even sold a couple of tickets myself. PERSONALLY. What did u do Ta-wtf-sha?
2) No we didn’t HIDE in the toilet. Whats there a need to hide? WE JUST DRANK BACKSTAGE. Loud and proud. I bet you get drunk on jolly shandy.
3) Cuz we felt like it.
4) Yup
5) Act? Act? Girl…I act when I’m in trouble. I act, when I’m in front of a camera and there’s a script. WHEN I PERFORM. That’s who I am. Don’t get jealous you’re such a STUCKUP person
6) Rectify? How about Ngee ann’s abuse of my sexual charm? Where is my pay? You think I eat Instant noodles everyday? So you don’t have any more credibility and now u want to use MINE?!?!??!
7) Yes…pay me please. Pasta is a good bribe. Wine….lots of it.
8) Nope nope nope, first Paul is a good friend so apologize for what? Second the principle is 2wice as cool as you so even he’ll understand the need to express ourselves as YOUTHS. I know the organizers. And their also more cool than you.

Cheers to jolly shandy!
Okay note to some people.

First irritating person who keeps on tagging on my tag board: I know u are the same person cuz ur IP is reoccurring...DUH. Change ur IP

Second to the durianz: i know ur won't read this even though we are the closest friends and I never bought any of you birthday presents and we always greet each other happy birthday about a week late................................but if u do.......I REALLY WANNA PLAY SOCCER.

Third to my hazel: CHLOOB. ( Norman speak for chosen loser noob)

Fourth to YOU: I KNEW U MISSED ME. i just knew it. i had it...a feeling you know? i had it there(points to gut)........ Not that i care really.

5th to another YOU: but no really we are friends. i feel the need to see other women.........hah just kidding. I meant I need to see ALOT of other women before anything u know?

5th Santa clause: dude....who u kidding with that Beard? and why are u so fat? And why u hang out with elves? if there is one person i want to beat up ITS U CUZ OF ALL THE INNOCENT KIDS WHO U'RE LYING TO. 2pid bajoni.

I’ve been thinking...and i want to go places.... no no I don't want to go far in life..... *something vulgar* that! I mean I want to go to FAR PLACES, like never-never land, yup I know where it is....................... Michael Jackson’s house.

First stop: Central Park(YES YES YES!)
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Second Stop: Louvre, Paris. wow. really wow.
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Last stop: LAO PA SAT HAWKER CENTRE!(hungry can?)
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Seriously la.... don't need the fancy nancy BS of the louvre or the serenity of Central park. Carrot cake and laksa. shiok. enough. and to think i had to go all the way to paris to enjoy life. HAH! Here have some fishcake.....MMM FISH CAKE.

Like have u ever wondered why the hawker stalls prices haven't went up yet? Does GST affect the hawkers really? do they have to pay goods and services tax? i mean...their not just selling goods and providing services, oh nonono, their providing GOOD SERVICES! Give me a singlet wearing uncle anytime and shove that Mcdonalds uniform up my.....okay not up mine, but yours.

if anything, the government has to be taxed. First...i don't get no goods NOR services from you, so i go get it myself la. And u want to TAX me for it? geez

I know this is overbearing on you guys but seriously inflation rates has had a TREMENDOUS detrimental financial effect on me as well!..........i mean....c'mon seven elevens, you could close ur shop for A COUPLE OF HOURS RIGHT? to cut cost no? U cannot.... U JUST CANNOT..... Charge more than a $1.15 for mentos. i swear. if u do that it'll have severe psychological damage to me!

Here’s the math:
Norman's financial budget for Mentos(necessity)
avg price of mentos= $1
How much Norman prepared to pay for weekly mentos supply= $7
Cost variance (due to stress or meeting too many sweet toothed people)= 7+2=$9

thats one mentos tube a day. i'm a tube-a-day-mentos-sucker(everyone has an addiction right?)

Pro Forma statement:
Price of mentos due to inflation (good-for-nothing-IR)= $1.20!!!!
Number of tubes Norman can buy per week= $7 / $1.20= 5.833333 Mentos/Week

I HAVE TO CUT DOWN BY 2 MENTOS PER WEEK CAN U BELIEVE IT?!?!?!? i might suffer from MWS!(mentos withdrawal symptom)

And now i realized that the government missed out some crucial factors when discussing this years budget plan. Ok for those of u that duns know, here's what they are going to do:

1. Tax the rich
2. Give the poor

Sounds robin hoodish i know. Forgivingly noble. Awfully forward thinking. There’s a hint of plot-to-steal-our-cash in there but its negligible. but they missed out on a minor detail that might be the MAKE OR BREAK for Singapore.


Am i rich? No. am i poor? No. Am I handsome? Extremely. So where does that leave me?


it sucks to be taxed I’m sure. its not too cool to be spoon-fed by old men in suits as well, that’s for sure. but what about being...NOT AFFECTED. what?what about the not-rich-not-poor-incredibly-handsome-unusually-charming-outrageously-witty-dashingly-Charismatic-no-money-where-my-money guy like me? Where does that put me?

Dinner party scene:
Social idiot: ah taxes.... going up up up. Everything is going up. Its so expensive to live in Singapore nowadays.
Me: yah.
Social idiot #2: yah! The prices of everything is so expensive now. The rising GST is really making shopping a bore!
Me: yah.
Social Idiot #3: oh and the property has been soaring! People selling property like pancakes!
Me: yah..... so have you heard Man Utd just bought Hargreaves, Nani and anderson!?!?!?
Social idiot #1,2,3: yah
Me: WHAT YAH!?!??! WHY DON"T YOU BAJONIES YAH THIS!!! *offensive gesture on both hands* (clue: its not my 2nd finger.............dun know?...............okay okay its the my index finger as well)

^ see? Notice something? I’m just....not cool in that conversation. Not cool. bo pian not my fault, Government never think about me.

We are the FUTURE OF SINGAPORE! i'm going to be the first Singaporean to make it to the Billboard charts!!!!!....................right after people stop listening to britney spears.

Estimated Britney’s useful life after 10 more marriages, 20 more babies, 5 more almost number 1 singles...................should be around 20 years. gosh I’ll be 39 by then......hmmm never mind I’ll sell to the middle aged crisis people. I’ll sing about taxes. I’m sure they'll relate.

i realize the longer i blog, the longer i stay away from blogging.
Judging from today's post it'll be a good year before i start blogging again.
well.... at least girls still like me.

yours guys-i-really-wanna-play-soccer-kal-please-don't-pangseh-us-ly
Norman The Great!